CLEARING THE AIR
I smoke as often as I need to- with coffee, alcohol, after a good meal, during conversations, with friends, while resting, solving a problem, calming myself down and even after exercise(my reward for being good). So, the chance of quitting seemed next to nil. That’s why i wouldnt be surprised to receive unconvinced remarks when I, the almost two-pack/day smoker, finally licked the habit for good five months ago. NO VIOLENT REACTIONS 
My family still don’t know but if they do, it will definitely be a celebration. Most of my friends, too, have no idea. So guys, ‘totoo na ‘to.’ You have no choice but believe because I just did.
I started to smoke when I was in my last year in college. Nobody introduced this to me. Back then, I saw how my dad (even how my late brother secretly smokes). Some of my guy friends smokes too. I think the primary reason I smoked was the image it portrays. Smokers are shown as being cool, daring, energetic and athletic winners. Cigarettes seemed like a very attractive accessory. In a way, it was also peer influence (should I say past’s) and having to do with one’s hand during social situations.
I did have countless of attempts to quit throughout the 3 years, all it took was weight gain and unimaginable tempers..hehe And oh, I was with a die-hard, full time smoker. that made me fall off the wagon. Also, my mind wasnt really into quitting. At the back of my mind, I knew it would be easy to quit my resolve to quit. Besides, no one could ever dare to be seriously averse to me.
Ironically, smoking was the very reason I kicked the habit, cold turkey at that, 5 months ago. ****EDITED****hehe To make the story short, I had a false alarm from my x-ray exams. I thought I had some infection and all. I got paranoid for a week while waiting for the 2nd result. People have no idea how I was back then. haha I was too careful of telling anyone coz i cannot afford to hear another line of crap such as, ‘ikaw kasi, tigas ulo mo.’ I knew I was at fault. Good thing it turned out to be just a false alarm. WHoa!!! I cannot die young, sexy and poor.. Seriously, I know it was time to quit. Since then, I never felt the urge to light up. YES, tempetations are there and everyday is a struggle for me. Well, smoking is like a bad love affair to me. When it’s over, you never look back.
Now I no longer seek the confines of the smoking sections of the restaurants or be obsessed about splashing a cologne every after each stick. I have more energy, just like when I was still in sports back then, more time and more concentration. Eveything is well now. I now feel cleaner inside and out. Looking back, cigarettes was like my sort-of bestfriend. It gave me a lot of comfort and pleasure. I dont regret being a smoker but I’m happier and way better being a non-smoker.
ahem. I’m not trying to pressure others. You know who you are. You know Im tolerant when it comes to that coz I know you’ll feel tired of it in time just like what I felt.
I have never disclosed this to my recent friends. im not ashamed or hiding something. But I’d be prouder to talk about other than this.
